Here’s why I hate the internet: there’s too much information available.
My TV melted (don’t ask), so I need a new one. I’m trying to find a 46-47″ flat screen and am trying to figure out which one would be the best value (as a jew I’m required to get a good value for the items I buy).
The problem is that every single fuckin television out there is either great, ok, or shit depending on where you look. Every single one. If you listen to the “unbiased reviews” you get one opinion. If you listen to the “-philes” you get another opinion. If you listen to the average schmuck who bought one and used it for a while you get yet another opinion. And never do the opinions from the different sources match.
So do you listen to the unbiased, the dork who is way too into the minute details of video reproduction on liquid crystal/plasma displays, or Joe Average? It’s all bullshit if you ask me, and the internet makes it impossible to do anything more than make an educated guess as to which anything is the right one for you.
(BTW, this appears to be the winner of the “hang on a wall in my house” sweepstakes. Fuck what anyone thinks about it.)
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In other news, I was driving out to where I ran 20 miles at 4:30am the other day (like a moron) and was mindlessly flipping through the channels on the radio to get my mind off the pain I was about to inflict on myself. Something I came across was the Kim Komando radio show. I’ve never listened to her for more than a minute or two, but it’s obvious that she serves a purpose: to guide old people and retards through using basic technology because they’re too feeble or stupid to figure it out for themselves.
Then it struck me that Oprah does the exact same thing, only she does it to guide the feeble and stupid through life.
Considering the great livings they make, which is an understatement when talking about Oprah, there sure are a lot of feeble and stupid out there. Sad, really.
You haven’t even hit the tip of the iceberg on feeble and stupid. Look at the different cults (both religious and not) to see how many people just really want somebody else to make their decisions. I could make you a list of the usual suspects, but I’d probably hurt somebody’s feelings.
So e-mail it to me!
I used to watch Oprah back in the day when my kids were little and I was stuck in the house. I liked her better when her show was like Maury Povich, and her guests used to scream at each other, like the woman who came home from work early and caught her husband in their bed with a hooker. Last night, I was flipping channels and noticed Oprah was on and her entire show consisted of Jenny McCarthy, who I once saw on the Howard Stern show with some sleazebag manager old enough to be her father, and Jim Carrey, who I also cannot abide and who is about as funny as a rubber crutch. The two of them were talking about their relationship. For the entire show. Who in the hell wants to watch THAT?!